Wednesday, June 30, 2010
@ 8:52 AM
hey, saw those photos up there, it took me quite awhile to make it like perfect.
i know this only mean pictures of me and my ex, phy, but this means more then my life.
baby, i know that this day will come, whereby you will choose to let me go.
i was utterly disappointed in myself for letting you down.
you are tired of me.
you are tired of everything.
we both make a mistake and misunderstood each other, yet you have to end it.
you said, you will overcome this obstacles with me, push everything that block our way.
amazingly, you did, but not for long.
my heart ache when it flash back to the day we was at sky garden looking at spore flyer.
and you hugged me.
i felt your love.
but soon after we left, your love was different.
i dont seem to understand what am i thinking.
you crossed th road without holding my hands, twice.
i closed one eyes, trying to make amendment.
yet i failed, i saw somethings that i shouldnt see and it totally breaks me down.
i sent you to work, and i drag my feet back home, i felt numb.
i can feel my heart pumping.
why cant it just stopped?
this question keep flashing in my mind "you know i love you, why do you have to do this?"
i went back with you caused you need not work.
i hold your hands.
holding it tight.
will i be able to touch your warm hands ever again?
will i just have to hold mine, and walk the path, alone?
absolutely nothing was on my mind.
all i want is your warmth, now im experiencing nothing but coldness.
i saw your beautiful smile when we are walking, together.
yet it dont seem to last that long.
everything just screw up when i saw something again.
i attituted, im angry, im frustrated, im bleeding profusely, yet you only see th anger in me.
you didnt notice how paranoid i was.
i left a great impact on you when we part off, which leads you to think, and say goodbye.
today, i wanted to start on a new leaf, yet i cant resist not smsing you.
im just so worried, if anything happens, i wont be able to know.
im thinking every minute, whether are you hungry, are you sleepy, did you hurt yourself, did you find trouble, did you sms her......
why did i have to break down in th wrong timing.
i promise myself, not to cry infront of my friends, but my heart is bleeding.
i dont wanna give them more flaws, cause they have had enough of me and my life.
im just too lonely, i have no one now.
i tear when i saw couple, i sob when i saw them holding hands, but i cried when i see your photo.
didnt wanna think of anything that links to making you hurt anymore.
even if it hurts so much, making you hurt is killing me.
but im sacrificing, for you,phyllis lim, baby, listen to me, i will never let you off my grip.
